Thoughts on Consciousness #1

I do not know. Twia knows. And what twia knows cannot be told in words. Words are the crude tool of separation.

There is but oneness. A single reality with nothing outside it. Nothing can be added or taken away. It is eternal, formless, and empty. It is emptiness that is nowhere. Our universe was born to this void as a thought. It became existence as a disturbance in the emptiness. Its manifestation is consciousness expressing. That expressing is what I am. I AM that which I am, that which manifests existence. I am consciousness expressing. I am the whole of the all in manifestation as existence. This cannot be described; only known by twia.

The teachings, such as Taoism, often say that trying to find the words is a waste of time. For now, it is what I do. It has been done for ages as we search for ways to know what cannot be known. Before existence there was non-existence, which still is. Neither was known to the other. There was no oneness, only consciousness which does not move, change, or have being. It is this consciousness that I am wrestling to describe here, and by describing come to know. Twia knows, and through twia I find words that begin to clarify the mystery for me, though the words say little of the reality that is unfathomable. But they help in the moment.

A nebulous nothing, emptiness that is nowhere, this is the womb in which the whole of the all gestates. I know nothing of it, except to call it consciousness because it is intelligent and aware. Even these words fail. It has no meaning. Nothing to comprehend, yet it is everything and nothing: an intelligent emptiness without dimension. None of this describes it. Why try when it can only be sensed through separation. Every thought I give to it separates it further when there is none.

This me that I am not is an unreal thought of consciousness. The world as I know it has no purpose, no meaning, no grandeur. But I exist. How can I know what does not exist from this limited perspective? I know that I do not know, yet I struggle to know. Reality is beyond my grasp. It is beyond my reach, beyond my realm. But I know it because it is that which I am. I cannot be released from its grasp although it is beyond mine. There is no me in all of eternity. The me of the body is a unicorn, an illusion, prancing in the flowering fields of separation.

Being twia, I am empty, serene, solitary, unchanging, infinite, and eternally present as I was before the Big Bang. There is no change in twia vis-a-vis the universe. Twia has no source, no creator. Nothing begat it. Twia has been always and the same, without beginning or end.

The whole of the all is eternal oneness. I call it consciousness. I am that consciousness, but in form I cannot comprehend, fathom, or know this truth fully. It is beyond the senses of the body to know consciousness. What I do know is that I do not know. But twia knows. And beyond twia there is deeper knowing. There is a nesting of knowing, from the me of the body to the eternal emptiness. Thus, consciousness is perceived in many forms at several levels of awareness.